ON BEING A WOMAN IN THE PROGRAM
This Blog is written by the Creator of StillPoint Love™, Ester Zazzaro. She is the facilitator of a Facebook Group and Patreon community. As a subscriber you have access to never before seen content and special offerings available only to those already behind the veil of StillPoint Love™.
By Ester Zazzaro
I was grown in a lineage whereby the man's role in the family home is the last word. The last word of authority.
Men do not really know what it is like to be a woman conditioned to place man's position above theirs. Even in marginalised groups of social hierarchy those women are usually perceived underneath the men in that cultural structure.
Women are so programmed. They do not feel comfortable to disclose to men how responsible they are to protect men's sense of self, before they can attempt to share 5% of their truest experience with a man. Men might hear women's anger however rarely do they hear the delicacy in the woman's exposure of jealousy towards the programmed lens of man being the one in charge. A programming that seems to lend itself to giving the man license to state his opinion strongly and that being enough for it to carry dominion. (Maybe not with other men however and it is precisely because it is not with other men that it becomes paramount that women see him this way).
As a woman I have yearned for, especially in my relationships with men that I would be given that privilege freely. Freely in that my honesty could be given without fear of reducing the man's impression of himself.
Can you imagine being given the narrative that unless my experience favours the man's perspective, paints only a positive picture of his behaviour, that I can minimise his view of himself? That my perspective of man carries so much weight in how he experiences himself?
Through joint compliance in our agreement for one gender to have an over-arching jurisdiction we give so much responsibility to the woman and also an unbalanced dynamic is established. As soon as this over-arching position of man is met with any kind of inquiry the role he stands on is minimised by design. The woman is given so much power and at the same time made completely powerless in her use of it.
It stands to reason then that when women take the space to vocalise their truth it is assessed as to how much it takes over a man's position. How much it oversteps the boundary of men and then adjudicated on its merit as a worthy subject to highlight at all.
Often instead women are congratulated for how soft they can deliver the message. How much empathy they can demonstrate towards the Other while they express.
Image : A tree in New Orleans (Katie Boeck)
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